Um...Come Again?!

I give up. My genetic code has one purpose. To kill me.

For the past year or so I've had horrible on again/off again pain on the right side of my mouth. Naturally, I figured I had a cavity, or maybe even 7 the way I was hurting. So, like most of us do when we think about having to go to the dentist, I ignored it. It wasn't too bad, and luckily it wasn't constant. Nothing a little Tylenol can't fix. I left it at that.

On our cruise I started having the pain again at night. It was constant all through the night and it HURT! Yet again, I figured it would go away, but by the time we got home I was experiencing the most agonizing pain I have ever experienced all day and all night. To put it in my mom's words, 'I'd rather have twins naturally.' (She has experienced the same pain due to an abscess on her tooth when a root canal went amiss) I finally gave in and called the dentist.

Side note: For those of you who don't know, I'd rather pull out my own teeth with pliers (which was what I was planning on doing if the pain didn't stop) than go to the dentist.

Of course, my dentist takes Friday's off. So I asked around and luckily Cali recommended her dentist which luckily wasn't a slacker and was working on Friday. I rushed over, sat my self in the chair and expected the worst. After a couple rounds of x-rays the dentist was baffled. He said my teeth were impeccable and that he could see nothing wrong. As I tried to hold back my tears he told me that it had to be something neurological, and that he doubted my brain tumor was involved.

I don't trust dentists when it comes to my brain.

So I called my neurosurgeon who of course wasn't in. I have had it up to here with him. I left a message with his 'secretary' that I was writhing in pain and that I needed to see him STAT. Then, my last ditch effort, I called my regular physician Dr. Carn, who OF COURSE got me in right away. (I see Dr. Carn and Jen (his nurse and my pal) more than I see most family members) On my way to Dr. Carn's office Pat, a PA from the neuro-clinic called and asked me about the pain I was having. After I explained it all to him he said, 'Yep, sounds like something is wrong neurologically.' Gee, thanks doc! He continued, 'Unfortunately Dr. Gardner will only be in 2 days before your scheduled appointment so we'll put you on the cancellation list.'

Right, like anyone is going to cancel their appointment! It takes months to get in!

Anyway, Dr. Carn is one stud of a doctor. He came up with a diagnosis...

Trigeminal Neuralgia.

Google that one folks.

This means that the nerve in my face (Trigeminal nerve) is wigging out and firing when it ought not to be. Here is what I have found on my new condition, oh, which is NOT tumor related I might add...

'TN (Trigeminal Neuralgia) is a pain that is described as among the most acute known to mankind. TN produces excruciating, lightning strikes of facial pain, typically near the nose, lips, eyes or ears. TN is a disorder of the fifth cranial (trigeminal) nerve that causes episodes of intense, stabbing, electric shock-like pain in the areas of the face where the branches of the nerve are distributed - lips, eyes, nose, scalp, forehead, upper jaw, and lower jaw. By many, it's called the "suicide disease". The disorder most often affects one side of the face, but some patients experience pain at different times on both sides. Onset of symptoms occurs most often after age 50, but cases are known in children and even infants. Something as simple and routine as brushing the teeth, putting on makeup or even a slight breeze can trigger an attack, resulting in sheer agony for the individual. Trigeminal neuralgia is not fatal, but it is universally considered to be the most painful affliction known to medical practice. Initial treatment of TN is usually by means of anti-convulsant drugs, such as Tegretol or Neurontin. Some anti-depressant drugs also have significant pain relieving effects. Should medication be ineffective or if it produces undesirable side effects, neurosurgical procedures are available to relieve pressure on the nerve or to reduce nerve sensitivity. Some patients report having reduced or relieved pain by means of alternative medical therapies such as acupuncture, chiropractic adjustment, self-hypnosis or meditation.'

So I am on Neurontin and Dr. Carn says it'll take about 2-3 weeks for it to really become effective. Until then, I am staying oh so heavily medicated to keep the pain under control. I read elsewhere that even the most potent of pain meds don't have the capacity to take away the pain completely.

Bring on the percs. I'm funnier when I'm medicated anyway...